This picture might be familiar, especially if you’re the first or last person at a rugby club in Winter.

Over the past 10+ years I’ve spent coaching, I’ve often been the first person to a club to open up the pitches and set up for a session. It can either be going dark or completely be dark by the time I arrive to set up and dark when the players arrive.

Clubs and their infrastructure can be organised in different ways. There’s been times where I’ve had the means to turn on floodlights. At these clubs, this means I’m only in the dark on my route to and from the pitch.

In other clubs, the floodlights are either remotely turned on or on a timer. This has often meant I’ve not been in control at what time the lights come on. I’ve often been setting up in the dark and players are arriving to a pitch that isn’t lit.

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Safety Work

I’ve recently been reading about ‘Safety Work’. This is a term that refers to the invisible labour that women undertake to try and minimise the risk to sexual harassment in public places.

This includes changing the path to home after work, where to sit on public transport or scanning when walking. Vera-Gray and Kelly have coined the term and done alot of research in the area. They describe it as something that is internalised rather than decisions that are more conscious and casual1:

I recall consciously doing this. I also have probably done it unconsciously a countless number of times. There’s been times where I have felt uncomfortable travelling alone and I’ve rung my Dad to have someone on the phone. I recently discussed safety work with a friend who spoke about common the act of putting your keys in between your fingers when walking alone.

Safety work permeates everything, including spaces for physical activity. Authors Miles, Broad and Oldham examined how female runners change their routes and routine and had experienced abuse:2

How safe does your club feel?

Let’s examine how safe people might feel when arriving at a sports club in Winter, when it’s dark in the evenings. Clubs have a small amount of control over the public route to and from any sports ground. However, clubs can examine the routes people will take within their own ground. Don’t walk them in the middle of the day on a weekend. Walk the paths in the dark, in the winter.

I want to specifically examine the lighting of a sports club in Winter. I am not saying that lighting will solve all issues, but it will make a lot of people feel safer. I speak from experience.

For the people who open up the club

The walk you take should start at the boundary of the club. Check whether the person opening up the gate can see a lock easily or whether they have to balance holding their phone on torch mode whilst using a key or combination to open the gate. People may have their car headlights to illuminate them or they may be walking up to the gate to open up.

I’ve been a person that is opening up a sports club or pitches in the dark. It’s quite a vulnerable position. I’ve been on my own, in the dark, walking down a poorly lit path to unlock the gate to the club or pitches.

Just because the gates are unlocked to the club and sports pitches, doesn’t mean the environment now feels safe in the dark. In my experience, paths across car parks and to pitches are often poorly lit or have no lighting at all.

Car parks should be lit for obvious safety reasons. However if you’re walking alone in the dark, the vast expanse of a car park can make you feel more at risk.

Walking to switch on the floodlights or to the pitches often means traversing paths that aren’t illuminated.

I’ve been the lone volunteer/coach setting up the pitches or walking to them in darkness. It hasn’t felt very safe. I’ve often let my Dad know my timings, when the floodlights come on or when someone else is due to arrive. There’s also been some incidents when I’ve been setting up in the dark or when I’ve been at a club on my own preparing for a session.

In my experience, nobody thinks about the route to and from the pitches. Clubs consider the floodlit pitches and the fact that you’re on the club grounds enough.

For the people playing at the club

Not having illuminated routes to and from a pitch can be really daunting, especially for people that are new to the club.

For any existing players, they may arrive in groups and learn how to navigate the dark. This doesn’t mean they feel safe on this route, it means they’ve found a way to walk together and acknowledge the dark path on the way to training.

For anyone new to the club (coming to a women’s rugby taster session for example), the dark path can be unwelcoming and can make them feel like they’re not in the right place.

I’ve received messages from potential new team members who have been stood on a dark path wondering if they’re in the right place. A dark path, even though there are floodlit pitches visible, is not a welcoming site. It does not feel safe.

How can we make our clubs feel safer?

Your club might be a brilliant environment. You might know this. Yet knowing is different from feeling.

If a volunteer has to navigate dark routes to unlock everything, or if players walk an unlit path to get from their cars or the club entrance to their training pitches, then it does not feel safe.

If you’re prompted to go on a walk around your club similar to the one I suggested at the start. You’ll probably identify spaces that need better lighting.

These paths could be towards your floodlight switches, on the way up to the pitches, to and from the kit shed, towards the clubhouse or to the toilets.

This sounds like a major project to add lighting and electrical infrastructure to sports clubs. It might be something your club has to work towards.

There are smaller steps that can be taken to help. A club can start by adding some solar lights to pathways. It won’t provide a lot of light, but it’s better than a completely dark path.

It’s not enough to have a floodlit pitch. Lighting can make areas feel safer and encourage more people to go to. It feels simple and obvious to be discussing lighting. Yet many clubs don’t have illuminated paths.

If you have shared grounds and the conversation around lighting might take longer, there are other options. You could organise a system where people open up facilities together, so no one is on site on their own in the dark. You could also have designated and visible volunteers who are there to help guide people and be there for information, including safeguarding.

I am calling on NGBs to provide resources to help clubs make their grounds feel safer. This includes funding for lit pathways, car parks and entrances.

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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Women in Sport is a charity that was founded in 1984, and our vision is that no one is excluded from the joy, fulfilment and lifelong benefits of sport. Recognising that gender stereotypes and institutional bias are holding women back in life and in sport, the charity’s purpose is to create lasting positive change for women and girls in sport and society.

We have a track record of success in securing change based on our deep understanding of the environment and culture surrounding women and girls in sport. Women in Sport is determined to win the battle for equality and is leading the way in influencing the system and campaigning to stamp out stubborn gender stereotyping.

Showcasing female coaches

We’ve created a first-of-its-kind Women in Coaching Image Library to champion and celebrate female sports coaches.

The library contains hundreds of epic images, captured by photographer Suze Eyles, showing female coaches from across sport and the value women bring to coaching every day.

The work, which is part of the Women’s Coaching Taskforce, aims to give female coaches more visibility so helping to normalise the skill, leadership and impact that women can have in coaching roles.

The images (which are free for Sport England system partners) are available on our website and will help to redefine what it looks like to be a great coach.

The project comes from the findings of our foundational research into the experiences of female sports coaches, Reimaging Sport Coaching: Designing a System that Works for Women.

It is part – by no means all – of the solution to the challenges we found face female coaches. This research, and the work that has flowed from is, was funded by Sport England.

Working with our amazing professional photographer and NGBs, we commissioned a set of original photos of real-life female sports coaches doing what they do best, coaching. The photos cover a range of sports at all levels – from grassroots to elite.

We all know female coaches play a vital role in sport. They bring technical expertise, strong leadership and the lived experience that helps women and girls feel that they belong.

Yet in 2026, women are still undervalued and underrepresented in coaching. Our research has found that 30% of female coaches report being bullied (twice as many as male coaches), and are 18% less likely to say their opinions are heard and respected.

Despite good intentions, many approaches still focus on ‘fixing the women’, encouraging resilience, confidence or aspiration, rather than improving the conditions that make it harder for women to enter and stay in coaching.

The issue is not women’s capability; it is the system they work within. The representation of coaches, and the stereotype vision of a coach as a man with a whistle, is part of that system.

We celebrated the launch of our photo exhibition, ‘What Makes a great Coach’ at Manchester’s Central Library alongside friends from across the sports sector.

Speaking at the event, Yasmin Clarke, an elite tennis coach who helped curate the exhibition, described the qualities at the heart of coaching: “A great coach knows the sport, knows the person, and stands beside them.”

These themes are present throughout the image library and act as a reminder of the importance of diversity within coaching roles.

Reflecting on the importance of representation and visibility in coaching, Stephanie Hilborne OBE, Chief Executive of Women in Sport, said: “Having female coaches in sport is a vital part of letting girls dream. It shows girls that women belong in positions of influence and leadership, and ensures girls have someone in their corner who understand their experiences in sport.”

The need to create more opportunities for women in coaching was echoed by Jon Norfolk MBE, Head Coach for GB Cycling, who spoke about the role organisations can play in supporting progress. He said: “As a man supporting women in coaching, organisations like Women in Sport provide best practices, help me articulate my thoughts and give me permission to make mistakes. Let’s not be afraid to dream. Let’s not stop dreaming about what might look impossible today, but might be possible in ten years time.”

We’ve already had approaches from a number of sports and other organisations from within the wider sport sector; both those who are keen to use the photos and those who want to add their own photos, of their sport’s amazing women, to the library.

The large scale canvasses that we displayed at our launch event have also attracted considerable interest from organisations who want to display them at their own offices and events, highlighting the incredible women in the images and the importance of female coaches to sport.

Women already have the knowledge, skills and experience needed to be great coaches, and these photographs celebrate exactly that!

The diversity of women in the images, of the sports they’re coaching and the levels at which they’re coaching demonstrates that female coaches belong anywhere they choose.

We know that this piece of work on its own won’t deliver the transformation to the coaching system that female coaches need and deserve. That change has to be systemic.

You can find our major policy recommendations to achieve this here: Reimagining Sport Coaching: Designing a System That Works for Women - Women in Sport Charity

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Training helps us prepare for matchdays and develop our players. As coaches we plan sessions that focus on key areas including tactical, technical, mental and physical parts of the game.

However, there are areas of the game we don’t always consider. These include gaps when the ball is not in play, such as half times or when a scrum is being set up.

Adding these into training can come from an awareness of your team’s rhythm, especially if your matches are recorded. You can make a note of the ball in play time, how long there is to set up a lineout or scrum and then aim to replicate aspects of that in training.

Another element of the game we don’t always consider training is match officials. If we have co-coaches they can referee the match, but how they referee can help players develop.

I’ve written about the use of referees before and how you can engage players. It was one of the very first posts I did.

These are great starting guides if you’re wanting to use referees in your training more often and don’t know where to start. As well as using co-coaches or players as referees, you can also bring in qualified match officials as one-offs to help your team. This can be helpful practice for the referees as well as your players.

Having a referee at training can help players to build their mental resilience and leadership skills.

I like to deliberately use the referee to apply constraints on the training game, just like changing the rules of a game. I’ll ask for the referee to notice particular things that we’ve been working on. This could be rucking or offside. Just like any other training activity you can scale up or down the contact.

I often like to vary which team gets put under pressure. I will ask a referee to make harsher calls on one team for the first half of the game and then swap after a simulated half time.

This gives the players different challenges.

For the team that is being penalised:

It puts them under pressure and simulates what might happen if they give away alot of penalities. It tests their mental resilience and creates opportunities for the captains to practice talking to the referee.

For the team that has been given opportunities:

It creates a space to think about what to do in penalty situations in different areas of the pitch and at different points in the match. This might give them opportunities to practice their tap penalties, lineouts or penalty kicks.

Why try this?

Teams may find themselves under pressure in a match. How they speak to referees and how they respond is a skill that can be practised. It can also help teams commit less penalties. It can aid your team’s decision making when benefitting from penalities.

Developing mental resilience is a large benefit of using referees at your training session. Players may have a large sense of justice. (This can also be a neurodivergent trait). Helping players understand how a referee might apply the laws or how to react if they are being penalised can help teams start to discuss mental skills and how to support each other.

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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There was an element of disbelief. It felt almost out of body, I was here again. I opened the email and read the expected words ‘not needed’. I let it settle over me: not wanted, not necessary, not welcome.

I haven’t yet come across a female coach who has not experienced some version of this at least once. You’ve made the mistake of being better than a man and for that you must be punished.

Often you don’t even need to be better, you may never know what you did. Something you did, maybe even just existing, you will have made an insecure man feel inadequate and that cannot go unanswered.

There’s a familiar pattern. It will start small, there will be comments, little barbs, always deniable. If you take issue, you’re told ‘it’s a joke’ even though you aren’t sure why it’s funny and no one else seems to be laughing.

You are an outsider who doesn’t get the camaraderie of the club, already you are being told that this isn’t your place and you don’t belong.

You might find that your achievements are ignored. They may even be claimed by other people.

A male coach might have been at the club for a few weeks, or never interacted with your athletes, but the club’s success is his success. He is amazing. He’s as an asset to the club, whilst you are a shadow.

You might try to work harder, demonstrate that you are a good coach, that you are part of the club. You and your labour are invisible. You feel taken for granted.

If you have the temerity to make a suggestion you get rebuked. These land too sharply, too abruptly. You notice that no one else gets spoken to that way.

Your doubt your reactions to these rebuttals: ‘Am I being too emotional?’

If you have the audacity to try and confront the issue, and speak about the constant undermining and bullying, you’ll find it’s brushed away. It’s called a miscommunication or a misunderstanding. It sounds like the Victorian accusation of feminine hysteria.

You might now be labelled as being difficult and causing problems. It’s time for you to go. No one wants a troublemaker. In people’s eyes, it’s not the club’s fault.

You might have evidence, often lots of it. It won’t be enough. You’re stuck in a game where the rules are constantly changing. They’ll find some other way to get you. They will bring up your working patterns, your caring responsibilities, your coaching practice; it doesn’t work for the club. It can’t be accommodated, no adjustments will be made.

You have to make a choice. If you push it, you risk damaging the club which will harm the athletes. You have to decide who you want to hurt, yourself or the athletes.

You will walk away. A good coach always puts others first, a leader always eats last. You are cut off from your athletes, the community you helped build.

You start it all over again at another club and hope it will be different. You and your coaching style doesn’t fit the traditional, male-shaped-mould. You’re not accepted, not welcome and not wanted all because of who you are.

There are many stories like mine. How much time, potential, innovation and opportunity has been lost?

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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When you play games at training, how do they start and how do they restart?

If you only play a game at the end of training, I would be curious about why and whether your training replicates the feel of a match. However, that is a post for another day.

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Today I’m interested in the different ways a training game can be restarted. First let’s explore when there is a need to restart the game.

When do we restart?

If you only restart a game after a try has been scored, you’re potentially missing out on different scenarios to develop your team. Depending on the aims of the session, you might want to pause and restart the game at different points.

If you only pause when there’s a mistake you miss opportunities to highlight good moments with the players. It potentially risks players fearing your voice or whistle because they know there’s been a mistake.

Natural restarts can happen in your training games but you can also add them in. If you or the players pause the game you can the restart the game with a different scenario.

What restarts can we use?

You can include different restarts and scale the level of difficulty depending on your players.

Scrums:

You can vary where the scrums take place on a pitch but also how many players are in the scrum. I like to use 1v1 scrums. This means I can look at people’s individual confidence and body positioning. Returning to the basics, in any contact work, is always worth it.

Lineouts:

As well as changing the location of the lineout, like scrums you can also scale the lift and competition element to suit your team. You can remove or add a lift, change the number of people and whether the defenders can compete.

Goal line drop outs and kick offs:

Kicks are the most common form of restart used in games. Whilst it’s tricky to vary these, I’ll often drop in some questions about where the kick might go or how the receiving team should organise themselves.

How could we give players choice?

I like to include restarts in a way that give players choice. One way to do this is to put a rule into a training game: the team that scores decides what restart to use. As a coach you can veto the idea in case they decide something that is unsafe (15 v 15 person scrum for example!).

You can also print off cards with different restart options on them. Give different cards to each team and they have to use them all. They can use a restart card after they have scored.

This gives players the choice of which restart, includes a variety of scenarios for your team to work on and makes each training game slightly different. It also encourages the teams to score as they get an opportunity to use another card.

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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Please be aware that there are some difficult topics discussed in this episode.

If you want more information or support about any of the topics discussed:

Endometriosis UK

Freedom4Girls

LooseHeadz

State of Mind Sport

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How do you reflect on your sessions? How do you make notes from any learnings?

Have you considered doodling in the margins of your notepads?

On 1st November, Becky Skeen joins me to discuss ‘Developing reflections with doodling’.

It’s all about ways to reflect and include sketches and doodles in your practice…no drawing expertise needed!

Becky and I love using creative ways of exploring/thinking in our coaching so we’re coming online to talk through some ideas

Struggling with your coaching reflections? This one is for you.

Register here to join us for ‘Developing reflections with doodling’

Quick reminder that all webinars are free to join live. Recordings are available for paid subscribers and members.

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We are the U14s Girls coaching team at Fosse Falcons. Fosse Falcons is a formal cluster of girls clubs. Out coaching set up is formed of: Sarah, Kieron, and Brett who coach across the whole squad and Liz who handles welfare, logistics, and safeguarding contacts.

We wanted to kick off the 2026-2027 season by putting the squad in the driving seat. Instead of coaches dictating, the girls and parents contributed directly to goals, playing style, and team culture.

We asked the players questions about:

• Playing style and aims: attack shape, running lines, defensive line speed, season targets.

• Game situations: handling errors, reacting to ref calls, avoiding pre-match slump, resetting under pressure.

We also wanted input from the parents about the match-day environment feedback and individual player targets.

As coaches we had chats before the day so we could be aligned on the agenda and purpose. Liz prepared welfare/logistics. We set up flipcharts and prompts about mindset, match scenarios, and unit play.

We structured the day into different sections:

• Welcome (5 mins): Ground rules.

• Unit Identity & Aims (20 mins): Forwards/backs flipchart work and presentations.

• Housekeeping & Safeguarding (10 mins): Liz covering logistics and welfare.

• Breakouts (10 mins): Girls in mixed groups; parents discussing match-day culture.

• Squad Wrap-Up (5 mins): Agreeing standout themes.

• Individual Focus (10 mins): Players writing personal aims.

In Unit Identity & Aims, forwards and backs mapped out attack, defence, and success criteria on flipcharts, then presented it back to the group. In the breakout section, mixed groups worked through scenarios: pre-game focus, walking off proud, handling mistakes/ref decisions, training habits. In the final sections, players noted individual aims and improvement areas.

We wanted to create squad buy-in and accountability. This included shared standards, mutual support, and pride in the team.

The day also contains some welfare and logistical information, which meant each parent and player was present for that content.

The players were vocal, honest, and committed to higher intensity, better communication, and a no-blame culture.

Breakout groups

In the breakout section, each group had a specific focus to discuss:

There were 4 groups each containing 4-5 players and 1 parent group

● Group 1 (Players) – The Pre-Game Trap: Why do some teams look beaten before kickoff? What are they thinking? How do we make sure that never happens to us?

● Group 2 (Players) – The Exit Test: How do WE want to feel walking off the pitch after 60 minutes? How do we want supporters to feel watching us?

● Group 3 (Players) – Dealing with Mistakes & Pressure: When an error happens or a referee call goes against us, what does our reaction look like? What do we say (and not say) to reset quickly?

● Group 4 (Players) – Training Standards & Accountability: What does a 100% effort training session look and feel like? What habits do we commit to so matches become second nature?

● Group 5 (Parents) – Pride & Match-Day Experience: When the final whistle blows, how do you want to feel as parents watching? Aside from match results, what creates a truly successful season environment for your daughter

Individual goals

At the end of the session players were welcome to stay behind to set some individual goals. These were written on A4 cards and handed to coaches. The players had prompts to help them think about their goals:

● Areas to Improve: 2–3 specific skills, fitness areas, or game awareness points to work on.

● Positional Versatility: 2–3 positions I can or want to play (supporting squad rotation and depth).

● Attitude Commitment: 1 personal attitude commitment I make to my teammates every week.

Targets

As coaches we hope this will create shared language for attack/defence, agreed reset strategies, and full parent backing for positivity and competitiveness.

Some of the targets include:

Attack: Run onto the ball at pace, quick taps from penalties, solid pods.

Defence: Flat line speed, choke space, confident tackles.

Culture: Non-stop communication, respect (thanking the ref), zero-blame, mentorship, 100% effort, serious fun.

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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It’s been about six months since I first went full freelance. I’ve loved each second of it.

I’ve had the opportunity to work with, partner with and coach at some amazing organisations and clubs. (pictured above)

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This includes becoming a member of the EDI Advisory Board for Huddersfield Town, attending England RFL Wheelchair Pathway sessions for their female pathway, working with the Crusaders Leadership Programme and coaching and running coach development workshops at some great clubs.

Alongside this I’ve written my DProf thesis, launched the Cafe and organised the Summer webinars, plus all the regular content and podcast episodes. Now that I write it all down, I realise it’s alot!

Yet, none of this would be possible without you. You engage in the work, share it, chat with me, support me through paid subscriptions or through Buy Me A Coffee.

So thank you.

I will admit, it’s not been without it’s challenges. I am having fun, learning and supporting people to develop W&Gs sport. Yet, the finances are sometimes a struggle. This is a harsh reality of freelance work and I was ready for it. I have tried to not measure my success by how much I’ve earnt. Instead I’m measuring it on impact, on how I’ve made people feel, how I’ve helped them reflect on their coaching or improve their systems.

I still need to eat and therefore trying to not equate financial success to professional/personal success has been tough.

However, the community we are building together through these articles, group chats, webinars and cafes is amazing. It is a privilege to create a space where coaches can support and develop each other.

What’s next?

There’s some brilliant podcast episodes and articles being lined up and ready to hit your inboxes. Plus there’s the upcoming Winter webinars to get excited for, and our October Cafe is now accepting sign ups. (I’ll paste the link to the cafe and webinar information below)

Whilst my diary is filling up for 2026, I have some space for mentees/critical friends who want mentoring/development. I also have space for online or in person coach workshops and availability for guest coaching.

Lastly, it’s been a fantastic time for women’s sports, however recent incidents (the Sidney Sweeney and Callaway golf advert) means we’re still got a way to go.

I know there are some fantastic clubs and organisations which are supporting and learning how to support female participants and coaches. Others might need some more support, and there are still challenging environments out there.

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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Think you know sports? Prove it.

Listening to that level of entitlement and privilege made my blood pressure rise palpably.

Think you know fencing? Prove it.

That is the challenge I face every time I set foot in a fencing salle. Sometimes it is tacit, an atmosphere or an attitude. Yet there are still occasions, 35 years after I started fencing where people, almost exclusively men, are arrogant enough to say it to my face.

Even now as an experienced coach in my mid-forties, producing and supporting international athletes, there is no escape.

I am not alone, this is the challenge for all the women and girls in my sport; athletes, coaches or referees every time they set foot in a salle or go to a competition.

Fencing is a male dominated sport and my main weapon is sabre. Sabre was not accepted as a woman’s sport until 1998 by the FIE (our international governing body) and was not in the Olympics until 2004.

It remains a struggle to be a woman in this sport. Even though I am no longer a frightened teenage athlete building up the courage to walk into a club; knowing I would not only be the only woman sabreur but very likely the only woman in the whole room that night.

I was in the Great Britain squad and one of the top five woman sabruers in the UK at that time, but I was still made to feel like I wasn’t good enough.

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Even writing this article, I feel the need to qualify how good a coach I am, including how long I had been fencing, including being an international fencer. There are male coaches who have never have never been on the GBR squad, who only started in fencing a few years ago, who have not produced a single athlete of quality. They still have more authority, legitimacy and recognition than I do.

So what is it like to have to ‘prove it’, every single time you fence?

From the perspective of an athlete, it’s often a case of having to avoid certain clubs because comments get made just loud enough when you walk in: ‘unnatural, waste of time, never be any good’. I often have to make a choice:

Is it worth it tonight? Do I feel strong enough to go and get my head down, am I able to let the hostility roll off me or is it going to leave me hollow and worn out the next day?

These comments echo around my head.

I feel that if you do go, you’ll never be fast or strong enough to beat them. Even if you are a better fencer, they’ll still peacock around because they won even if you though you might have the fight of your life.

There’s no prizes for quality, no recognition of the brilliance that got you to 15-14 against someone often twice your size.

You have to walk a tightrope; you can’t fence too well though. If you get a good hit you better be ready for the next point when they’ll come thundering down the piste to smack you as hard as they can to prove their point.

It feels like they can’t be shown up by a girl. If you are too good, too successful, if you shine too brightly, you must be punished.

How can women and girls feel confident and comfortable to learn if they have to suffer through a fight with someone who you know is just going to hit you as hard as he can fifteen times.

It’s frowned upon to refuse a fight and you’ll just be labelled as moody or not a good sport. Though how allowing yourself to be assaulted in a way that would be criminal if you weren’t on a piste improves anyone’s game is a mystery to me?

I still see this situation at clubs in the UK; one woman I witnessed literally stood on the en garde line and just let herself be hit fifteen times. She didn’t make any effort, she didn’t put up a fight, she let the man get what he needed – to feel like a man – and then she could get on with her evening.

Just get it over with.

She didn’t want to have to ‘prove it’ that night but there was no escaping his need to prove that she didn’t know fencing as well as him.

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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You probably have heard about the latest Sydney Sweeney advert. It is an advert for Novig, the sports trading app, and it features Sweeney in various states of undress. Her nude or semi-nude body covered by different items of sports equipment.

There’s been a huge backlash online. My feed is full of women demonstrating what sporty women look like.

The sexualisation of women in sports in advertising is a relic I thought we had, for the most part, left behind in the 00’s. Novig and Sweeney decided to roll out the trope. It’s important to note that in a statement released by Novig, Sweeney is a ‘strategic partner and equity holder’1 in the company.

The objectification of women and what that means for female coaches is something I have explored within my DProf. Reducing women to pure sexual objects is an attempt to undermine our skills, intellect and achievements.

The objectification of women and girls pervades society, including sport. Teenage girls leave sport due to fear of judgement, especially from boys, and they worry about having the ‘right’ body.

The advert is for the male gaze.2 The advert uses Sweeney as an object, alongside the other objects/sports equipment she poses with. It is built for men and assumes that men will gamble if they see a woman nude/semi-nude whispering sports.

It also implies that men will only engage in women’s sports when there is sexual objectification. This undermines male allyship. Coded within the advert is an assumption that every man that watches women’s sports is just there to objectify women.

The advert is everything I hate. I love the groundswell of women posting their reactions and what women in sport look like. That goes without saying.

Beyond the overt objectification in order to “sell sports”, the tagline is also loaded with meaning for women in sport. The tagline of “think you know sports, prove it?” is meant to be a challenge to men to come and prove their worth and knowledge to impress a nude Sydney Sweeney.

Female coaches will know that phrase well. It carries a political and sexist layering. ‘Prove it’ is what I’ve had to do for most of my time coaching rugby. Layered within that is a message that women don’t know sports. I’ve been outright quizzed by men within rugby about my knowledge of the sport.

I won’t prove my knowledge. I won’t justify my place in sport.

PS. Check out a powerful article on Monday that explores more of this, using the ‘prove it’ tagline as a starting point.

Want to watch advertising that showcases women’s sports? Check out Nike’s Dream Crazier advert.

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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Anyone who knows me knows I can be quite harsh about myself. It can often be a default reaction for me to walk away from a session and instantly think it was a rubbish session.

I know that voice is not actually me. It’s my inner saboteur. This Summer was the first one after going full freelance. I got to spend it writing my DProf thesis but also coaching in different environments.

I’ve been coaching 10+ years. Sometimes, no matter how long you’ve been coaching, you just need things reaffirmed and a boost of confidence.

This Summer I coached small groups of adult women, large groups of adult women and children at a Summer camp.

It reminded me of a few lessons.

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Lesson 1: Appreciating the different types of coaching

I co-coached at the Summer camp, alongside some of my favourite people. I got the opportunity to have a lot of 1-2-1 interactions with players. I was grateful that my co-coaches gave me the space to do this.

Co-coaching is all about giving space for other people and being thoughtful in our impacts and interactions. I always picture it as one of those solar system models.

Each planet or moon can be a different co-coaching role. They operate relationally to each other, performing rhythms and movements. They move around a larger purpose (players, team, aims of session).

At the camp the other coaches gave space for me to have lots of 1-2-1 interactions with the players. I felt I was like an outer planet or moon circling around activities, observing and then helping to create some impact.

Describing myself as an outer planet or moon does not mean I felt excluded at all. On the contrary, I felt proud that we as a group of coaches had created space for each other to co-coach together. In co-coaching, the inner and outer planets are all important.

It’s easy to downplay the impact lots of 1-2-1 interactions can have. My inner saboteur tried to do this to me. Another coach kicked this thought out of my head. They remarked that they had seen me have those 1-2-1s all week and I had inspired them to try to coach like that.

The reality (and not the inner saboteur voice) is that I love those 1-2-1 coaching moments. Chatting to players, giving them challenges if they want, seeing them take that feedback or mini challenge back into the activity. I love it.

The benefits are huge too. One coach can lead the game and the main interactions and another gets to have 1-2-1 impacts. I spent time asking players if they wanted challenges, how spicy they wanted the challenge and celebrating with them when they completed it. This co-coaching method gets all players feeling involved and engaged.

Lesson 2: When Activities are Planned Right They Flow More

I love session design. It’s easily overcomplicated. You can also too easily let the session try and do too much work, instead of finding balance between activity and coaching interactions.

When you get it right, the session can flow like a river. Players notice it too.

There’s still some turbulence in this river. It’s not calm. The flow of the session shouldn’t remove all challenge moments for players.

Over the Summer I ran a Ready Set Rugby session. There sessions I relaunched where women from different clubs can come and have a training session led by me. The aim is to give women the feel of a rugby camp, the inclusivity of women’s rugby and a supportive learning environment. (PS. If your club wants to host one, drop me a message!)

For that session I planned activities that build the level of complexity with one thematic thread all the way through. The activities linked, so the skills and challenges could transfer from one activity to the next, and build to the final game.

Not an uncommon goal in session design.

This time, it really felt like the session clicked into place. The players noticed it too. They mentioned the transferable qualities of each activity. I loved it when they mentioned it because that meant it not only felt like it was flowing for me, but it also felt the same for them.

This doesn’t mean the players felt the session was easy. It meant they felt the level of the session build and how each activity was built on the last.

There’s often no way to judge whether this will happen before a session. Sometimes you get it just right, sometimes you have to adjust. That’s coaching.

Yet, for me, when you get it right it feels like a river. If it doesn’t feel like a river, I need to make some adjustments. These could be a change in activity, challenge level or a coach-player interaction.

These lessons, have been more reminders. I know these already. However, in the course of a long season or (in my case sometimes) people squashing your self belief through sexist encounters, you can forget. That can end up giving your inner saboteur more oxygen.

If this happens, leaning on a support network is great (we have some set up through this work for coaches/subscribers and women+ coaches, reach out if you want to join). Player feedback is also great, as those are the people directly engaging with your sessions.

What have been your lessons/reminders in coaching recently? Comment below to share yours!

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

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If the training paddock is a tough place to allow silence to fall, game day is a Mario Bros big boss with lava flying around, and a rogue Yoshi making life hard.

Last essay we looked at noticing (and how stillness might help coaches) during training. Now we turn to crunch time. Stillness was still very much on my mind as I moved into the first game days of the season. They were graduated quite nicely: first, an opposed training session with an external quality side, and then an evening game at home to test some theories, player and coach alike.

It’s easy to feel the five-minute unbroken observation we squeeze in on a Tuesday night vanishes the moment the whistle blows. Everything has a sense of urgency: it’s noisy, athletes are in a different state, and there’s a win on the line. You have your match-day squad to support, an opposition constantly trying to pull your structures apart, and a referee whose split-second interpretations dictate the rhythm of the afternoon. It’s normally at this point in the week I wish I could see from multiple perspectives at once (an excellent superpower wish, I will say).

For me, the sheer volume of energy and match-day noise used to translate into pacing the technical area or sideline (if you can get away with it). I’m sure at my first coaching club there’s still a rut in the earth where I eroded the soil on a weekly basis.

Then an old injury flared and pacing was no longer an option. Something weird happened: I noticed my thoughts were slower during a game. Now it could have been the painkillers acting as a sedative, but I preferred the thinking. I had cleaner messages as I was passing them through another player, and had less time as the team came to me to huddle up.

Once I was back and free to pace, I went right back to a high step count, high thought count, and decided it had to go.

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The quiet is in the story

A well-known technique - but one that can feel close to madness for the person muttering to themselves on the sideline - is narrating the game. It sharpens my match-day coaching threefold…

First, it allows for sharper pattern recognition. If you catch yourself saying a similar sentence a few times across a half, you notice the trend rather than an isolated mistake. I find it helps to switch between narrating only the team with the ball or only the team without it, never trying to do both at the same time.

It also zooms you out. A missed tackle reveals itself as an issue of poor field-spanning in the kick chase three phases earlier, because having a continuous story line anchors the game in a series rather than disconnected moments.

Finally, narration creates a layer of healthy detachment from the live action. I’ve never really been one to get caught up in the drama of a game day, but I certainly feel the nerves and tension rise right alongside the teams and the crowd. Running an internal commentary allows the game to unfold a little further away, turning the emotional noise into a sequence of decisions to be assessed.

I have even worn a microphone once or twice during a game and played the audio track back alongside the Veo footage in my review. It is a brilliant way to audit what you actually saw in real time, though you have to be prepared to wonder what on earth you were looking at in the heat of the moment.

Send less ripples

I think my pacing also had another consequence, in the same way my approach today does now: your players take their cues from you. Pacing will only ever be read as irritated, annoyed, or not centred in some way, in the same way leg bouncing is known as anxious or tapping points to discomfort. A rugby team co-regulates, a bench co-regulates, and you are a part of it. Holding the ship level is your role.

The energy we project from the technical area ripples directly into others. One of the most helpful models here for me is Yuri Hanin’s Individual Zones of Optimal Functioning (IZOF). The fly-by version is that every athlete has a distinct emotional and physiological bandwidth where their decision-making and skill execution thrive. Too hot or too cold, and the performance outcome is affected. My personal observation is that we can all influence each other’s state of readiness, meaning we must build game-day environments that create respect for these states (and their differences).

When we panic, pace, and react to every breakdown, our own visible anxiety drags players straight out of their zones, meaning they have to spend more energy (and require the knowledge) to bring themselves into optimal again. Having one eye on the energies around the coaching and playing groups, and encouraging understanding and awareness, will be key to managing match days.

Stillness offers less ripples, less disturbance (but not less care); regulating the emotional climate and meeting them with curiosity rather than more noise.

Regulating players through focus & questions

You can probably notice when a player gets caught in a loop (the repeating thought which provides comfort to a dysregulated brain). They tend to be commenting on a specific action from the game, or maybe a referee’s decision-making around one area of the game. They are no longer present; they’re playing history instead.

To guide them through to the present, John Whitmore’s GROW model becomes my friend, deliberately keeping our dialogue rooted in the ‘Reality’ phase:

• “What are you noticing out there?”

• “How does that picture feel to you around [X area of the game]?”

• “What do you think is our opportunity now?”

Players maintain agency, and you widen the scope of their noticing, through future-focused action. It pulls their emotional focus away from external uncontrollable and gently redirects their awareness back to their own senses, their own decisions, and their own teammates.

Half-time might be positively negative

Negative space becomes crucial at half-time. Coaches and the bench have had the luxury of standing still, regulating, and having choice and space to think for 40 minutes; the 15 on the field have not.

Look around sport and you will find hundreds of examples of players saying, ‘We told the coach we needed three minutes before anyone spoke,’ ‘We spent the first five in silence,’ or ‘We had just left it all on the field and needed time to regather.’

This might go against our instincts, but we must respect the brainpower available to us:

• Give them reboot time. A great time to pass round drinks and take stock of who’s in a hole. Read your players and respond in a considered way.

• Use smart brevity. Huddles should be practiced in training. Athletes will have opinions and things to say; having them well-versed in communicating effectively helps. In training, if someone gives a rambling point, follow it with the question: ‘On a game day, when brain space is precious, how would you communicate that point?’

• Target your input. When considering your own input, filter it: who actually needs this piece of information, and can they use it right now? If not, keep it in post-match.

Really, what we’re saying is match-day noticing doesn’t demand an answer for every phase of play. It asks instead for the composure to stay present, place a filter over the noise, and protect the space where impact happens.

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Core Focus of the Research

• The C.A.R.D.S. Framework: Explores how the Newcastle Falcons Academy operationalizes an acronym standing for Creativity, Awareness, Resilience, Decision-making, and Self-organisation.

• Practice Design: Details real-world, constrained training activities meant to mirror the unpredictable, chaotic nature of professional rugby union. [

• Match-Realistic Constraints: Explains structuring training pauses, sub-unit drills (like 1v1, 3v3, or 5v5 scrums/restarts), and video reflection around actual match-play metrics to build cognitive and physical resilience

Notes from Café:

· Took a while to read through because it kept sparking back to own practice

· Academic but easily applies to coaching practice

· Reflect own coaching nar…

Read more

Following the success of the Summer of learning….here comes the Winter webinars!

Join the Winter webinars with 3 rockstar acts! I’m excited to announce 3 webinars on topics to help your coaching practice and team. Becky Skeen, Andrew Brownhill and Jo Phillips are joining us to chat about coaching practice, reflections and mental fitness.

On 1st November, Becky Skeen joins me to discuss ‘Developing reflections with doodling’. It’s all about ways to reflect and include sketches and doodles in your practice…no drawing expertise needed! Struggling with your coaching reflections, this one is for you.

Register here to join us for ‘Developing reflections with doodling’

On 6th December, Australia based coach Andrew Brownhill joins us to discuss player-coach relationships. ‘Building connections with players’ will look at ways to connect with players and tools for your coaching

Register here to join us for ‘Building connections with players’

On 17th January, Jo Phillips joins us to discuss mental fitness in players and coaches. Jo is a speaker for mental health charity State of Mind. Jo will speak about her experiences within sport and discuss tools for players and coaches.

Register here to join us for ‘Mental fitness for players and coaches’

Each webinar will be held on Zoom. There are registration links for all 3 are above (You’ll also get some reminders to register ahead of each webinar). The webinars are available for subscribers and non-subscribers alike.

The recording will be available afterwards for paid subscribers and members.

Join in, bring your questions, get ready to boost your practice!

Subscribe now

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I am beginning to think coaching is its own constraint based game. There are endless rules & systems to expose athletes to, and we are trying to do it all in a constant race against sun-baked ground, player availability, and every other challenge we stand before. We make thousands of decisions about what to prioritize - what to intervene on.

So much so, that sometimes I wish I had picked a sport with less moving parts, athletics maybe, where we guide one athlete through their day or darts, where there is less at play to watch. This essay explores what it means to ‘notice’ on a training field, and why it’s a skill which needs conscious development in coaches of all kinds.

Now, a word to the side before we begin…Coaching faces a new dilemma. While data is an embedded part of our game (thanks money ball), AI pitches new levels of gadget and gizmos; all offering to offload some of our noticing into cold hard stats. A tempting prospect which should be considered in full before it’s a route we travel down.

Now, coaching is a three step when we consider train field coaching. A never ending cycle of interpreting, prioritizing, and intervening. In doing so, we place the spotlight on our baseline ability to notice. If we fail to spot that our fly-half is approaching the game without kicking, we won’t prioritise what’s going on & it will result in a missed intervention. If we don’t notice, we won’t coach.

Recently, someone asked me what I look at in sessions, essentially asking what my framework for noticing was. I greeted the paradox like an old friend (thanks Brené Brown). Frameworks (while useful and to be celebrated) can be rigid, linear, and prescribed; placing blinkers on as we go through a model. I reflected that noticing asks of us a different approach. It requires wayfaring: a willingness to drift, to let go of the checklist, and to respond to the session as it unfolds. The paradox being that the more tightly we cling to a rigid model of what we expect to see, the more we develop blind-spots. The aim is less solving the paradox and more holding the tension.

Bias

The balance is made harder by the way coaches arrive with a history, a bias. For at least sections of the game, they will sit within Martin Broadwell’s unconscious competence step of mastery (image below). Here, observation has become intuitive. For example, I called lineouts in my playing career, I now see where the opposition are likely to throw to without much internal struggle. Critical as a player, but as a coach? I now have to catch that feeling and then explore what it is exactly that I am reading, to enable me to coach it. Actively dredging up why I know that in order to explain it to someone else. A part of my history which changes how I approach problems.

When considering my frameworks for noticing, I lean instead on a different model. I use an intentional filter for each session. If the group is focusing on attack, the bulk of my attention sits in that domain; defensively, players might receive far less feedback in that session. As long as the curriculum is balanced over time, players will develop rounded and smoothly.

At the same time, I am holding Individual Development Plans (IDPs) in my peripheral vision. I will happily pull my attention away from our primary theme if a develop moment pops up right in front of me for an athlete working on a specific personal goal. In my setting, we share these IDPs, so I only have a small number to notice.

Present & Correct

Now, I mentioned noticing sits under coaching as a base skill, but if we ask what skill is behind that again (Sakichi Toyoda’s ‘five whys’) To notice any of this, we have to be present enough to see. We have to learn how to stand amongst the patterns.

Intervention makes us feel useful. But every time we rush to provide an immediate solution, we stop players recognising the consequence in real time too (which is the only feedback they would have on the pitch), we must balance allowing them to experience the environmental feedback, with wanting to accelerate their learning.

Stillness

I have been in Premiership offices while people tear about the place, it’s a normal part of the language. Sport moves quickly, so it’s easy to get picked up in the speed. Instead I’d challenge you to go to one of the top restaurants in the country at service time and see what you can spot. Dinner is game time for chefs. If you’ve gone to a good enough restaurant you will see stillness (the french laundry’s chefs table on Netflix works well if you’re intrigued, without the price tag of fine-dining).

As a chef, you know it’s going well if you put a plate down too loudly & the whole dining room turns towards you. Everything is set up to notice the details of the plate before you. Maybe rugby can take a noticing leaf from a brigade.

Observation is not a waiting to give instruction. It is an active discipline. It is stepping back from the chaos and resisting the urge to jump in, so the pitch can reveal the lesson. In the dining room, it looks a little different. Negative space on a plate: the space on a plate with nothing allows a dish to look cohesive (imagine the elements on the below plate all plated smushed together). There’s a calmness to the plate that comes from the gaps; it allows the diner to see the elements and understand the dish far better than if it were one solid mass.

Stillness on the training field is our negative space. It gives the session its clarity. A tool to be chosen, just like ‘pause’ ‘replay’ & questioning. When we stop filling every second with interventions, we give our athletes the room to feel the consequences, make the mistakes, and create their own understanding. They get to wayfare too.

Our ability to consciously tune in to noticing is key to increasing the quality of the information we work from. Betting information means better action. But how does that ability to be still survive when the pressure multiplies, the pace accelerates, and the stakes shift to a game day?

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The first Coaching Care Creativity Cafe is on the 6th September.

Join other coaches and discuss your thoughts about some research called: ‘Building a House of C.A.R.D.S.: The Practice Structures of Coaches in a Professional Rugby Union Academy’

A quick insight into the paper:

“Each season, we set out to create opportunities for every player in the Newcastle Falcons Academy to explore the boundaries of their capabilities and adapt to the changing nature of the game of rugby union by developing creativity, awareness, resilience, decision-making and self-organisation (C.A.R.D.S.) skills (England Rugby, 2017) . In this section, we provide real-world examples from the Academy setting of how we structure training activities with the aim of developing C.A.R.D.S. Being constrained by space, we are unable to give exhaustive coverage to our practice structures, but the examples offer a glimpse into how we coach and to how the individual C.A.R.D.S. skills are strongly interrelated.”

Sign ups to the cafe get the reading sent out beforehand. The cafe call is a chance to chat with fellow coaches about the ideas and topics.

Each cafe entry is £5. Discounted entry (£3.99) is for paid subscribers and members

Sign up to the Sept cafe here

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It’s my Dad’s Birthday today, and mine tomorrow. For those that know me, you’ll know my Dad is pretty important to me.

He’s one of the main reasons I’m a coach. Some of my earliest memories are going to matches with him and watching rugby (the All Blacks specifically) on TV.

Next week I’m on a short break from publishing content, but don’t worry I’ll be back on the 24th August. The break is needed partially because it’s the birthday/celebration week (my parent’s anniversary is also in a few days).

It’s also because I’m knee deep in finishing the DProf thesis, and a reminder that it’s important to take a break (especially following Stuart Edward’s article on coach’s mental health that went out earlier this week)

It’s also important to stop and take stock of all the work that’s been done so far. There’s been 28 podcast episodes and over 300 articles published.

I’ve recently added to this and have launched some memberships for coaches and added the cafe - think book club but for coaches!

I couldn’t have done any of this without all of you. I always think of how we can build this community, lift each other up, share ideas and problems.

The whatsapp networks are amazing and it’s a privilege to share that space with you all. The Women+ Coach Network has over 71 members currently and the subscriber/coach group is growing. Regardless of how many members there are in each chat sharing a space and seeing people connect with each other is what it’s all about.

I’m aware there’s a lot of resources and past articles for people to dig into, and I’m working on ways to make accessing this content easier. For now, I’ve organised the website and there’s tabs at the top of the page to help you locate topics.

There’s been a lot of ‘pinch me’ moments of the self employed life so far…putting together an exclusive delegation for the Crusaders Leadership Programme is one of them.

There will be some of you that know I can also be quite harsh on myself. My inner saboteur can be mean. I’m not doing enough or earning enough. What if I fail? I’m getting better at telling that voice to go away, but it takes practice.

The same voice often crops up after a coaching session to try and tell me the session I just ran was rubbish. I mentioned this in the recent webinar with Rusty. I often listen to players’ feedback or message someone in my coaching support network after to chat through some reflections.

So here’s to being kind to ourselves, taking breaks, digging through our archives to remind ourselves of cool ideas…and Happy Birthday Dad

Did you know there’s now coach memberships? There’s 3 tiers for coaches (or anyone who wants to support the work and wants support), there’s also a special tier for clubs and W&Gs sections. There’s a coaching hotline, access to webinar recordings, and monthly mentoring. Memberships start from £5 a month.

Check out the memberships

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