Male allyship
Male allyship has been a reoccuring theme recently. I wanted to check in with my friend and coaching bestie, Andy Stevens, who's been one of the most supportive mates I could have wished for.
I message Andy most weeks, most days, to chat coaching. He’s one of my coaching friends that I lean on. We swap ideas, get each other’s views on plans. He was also there for me during a very tough time in my coaching. He not only shows the value of male allyship but also the importance of a coaching network.
I define a male ally as a male with a genuine interest in your thoughts and ideas and comes with no preconceptions or bias.
Male allies can help to promote sport for the enjoyment and enrichment of the players regardless of gender and be a genuine critical friend.
There is still a lot of bias out there, despite the growth of the female game. I think a male ally speaking well of the female game (sadly) holds more impact or respect than if a female said the same thing.
The more the likes of Ugo Monye speak up about how entertaining the female game is, the more people will watch it. The Roses now get much higher spectator counts - I’m not saying that’s all Ugo’s doing, but the more “credibility” the female game is given by male allies, the more acceptance there will be among the wider fan base.
I’ll never forget an England double header at Twickenham.
The attendance was 88,500 for England v Samoa (paid for ticket), 11,400 for Red Roses v Canada straight after (included free of charge). The Roses put on a far more entertaining display!
I think male allies are even more important at grassroots level. We don’t have the same kind of impact or weight behind our words as male allis within the professional game, so there need to be more of them, and for them to be more vocal to have the same kind of impact.
Clubs also need to be better and support their female teams better. A lot run VIP lunches before 1st XV games on a Saturday, but Sunday afternoons are often lonely places when the women are playing.
It should be a case of the right coach for the role regardless of gender. I think it’s easier for a male to secure a role in the female game than a female securing a role in the male game - hopefully that will change as the likes of the Clealls move into coaching after they stop playing.
When we first connected, it was an interesting time for me. I was very much like a magpie and stealing everything shiny I could find and constantly on Twitter and Instagram looking for ideas to use/tweak/steal.
We seemed to be sharing pretty similar thoughts and ideas, and were both respectful of each other’s thoughts and keen to add other elements as well as question practices - and it kind of went from there.
There was also the podcast we did that really started the friendship off - and it’s just grown and grown from there.
We have very different backgrounds and coach different groups - but very much aligned. I didn’t set out looking for a coaching bestie, but I’m very happy with the one I ended up with!
This still sounds weird, but I still don’t see you (Jess) as a female coach - you’re a highly qualified and experienced colleague who I’m proud to call my Coaching Bestie. This should be the norm!
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Loved this read. What a great mate and champion of the female sport to have.